Happy Sunday Everyone:
About a month ago I wrote about my good friend, Ian. Reminder, played professional basketball in Europe for 10 years, back here now starting new career w/ his wife and 3 kids. He’s taken a liking to Jack/Thomas and has been kind enough to meet them at 6:15AM at a park Tuesdays/Thursdays and work them out. I’ve done it a few times, it’s not easy, nor is he.
Tuesday Morning, I’m downstairs working after doing my morning routine, its 6:05 and I’m barely hearing rumblings upstairs. Finally boys both come down at 6:10. I’m telling them they’re going to be late of which they are, and it’s not cool. After arriving late and leaving Ian solo for 10 minutes at the park he tells them “you can show up on time from here on out or we can run until the first guy pukes”. I of course, LOVE THIS. All of you parents know there is nothing better than a little co-parenting from a trusted/admired friend to help instill some important life lessons. Fast forward to Thursday, I’m heading back from a run, and loop around the street only to see Jack’s truck in the driveway at 6:00 AM. I call him and ask what they’re doing. He tells me “relax dad, its 8 minutes away, we’re fine”. Without flipping out (which would be my normal response), I simply tell them both as they’re walking out the door “I’ll tell you what boys, if I had the choice of setting my alarm 5 minutes earlier vs. the risk of running until I puked, I’m going with 5 minutes on the alarm all day”. Those little monsters made it. Ian called me laughing basically saying they rolled up at 6:14, sprinted to the field and were moving at 6:15.
Truth be told, I’m incredibly impressed with both of my boys for doing this. As Ian tells them every time “You see anyone else your age out here right now getting it done”, no….except for 1 other kid who is a sophomore playing football at Stanford (hmmmm). This is a different lesson for a different day. For me, this funny, but real story, is an opportunity to remind myself of a few things around time and commitment.
1. When people are willing to invest their time in us we have a responsibility to respect that time. Not just by being on time but what we actually do with the time they’ve given us. I think about my friend Don (81). He’s been meeting with me every Tuesday for 13 years. It’s easy to lose the appreciation of what he’s done for me with the time that he’s given me. How do I pay that back? just thinking about it changes my perspective of the time I get to spend with him, especially when I’m “too busy”. I “get” to spend time with him.
2. Would serve us all well to ask ourselves “is this on my time or theirs?”. Kind of like “Is this on my dime or yours?”. If someone is offering you their time, you better show up on time, physically and mentally. You’re either the teacher or the student, the client or provider of services, the friend that needs help or the friend that’s helping, in either position you’re an asset or a liability to the situation depending on how you show up. Show up on time and be all in.
3. Showing up late or not at all is sloppy, it suggests you don’t care, it suggests your time is more valuable than mine, it suggests you don’t take yourself seriously, it’s highly unprofessional. If you work with me and show up late, that’s what I’m thinking about you.
4. Think of 5 or 10 people you respect/trust/like. I can guarantee you 90% of the time they show up, and they show up on time.
5. The biggest picture of all is that we’re on a short and depleting tank of time. How we use it for ourselves, and those around us matters. One thing I love about writing this stuff out is it brings so much more clarity to me as to the “why” I’m doing what I’m doing and if my calendar and the people I’m spending my time with are in alignment with my “why”. Don’t be offended if I cancel on you this week:)
My boys are awesome kids. I love them both a great deal and they can read this one when they’re in their 20’s. I’m not pounding this into them at this stage…they’re young and learning but I will remember 5 minutes early or puke for the rest of my life.
Picture of Ian attached. Would you want him yelling at you until you puked?