Happy Sunday Everyone:
Of course, a very special Happy Father’s Day to all us Dads!! As I sit here and write this out, I’m thinking about my own dad, I’m thinking about my boys, and thinking about how it’s worked out so far. I’ve talked about the concept that we turn out the way we do in our life “because” of people, or “in spite” of people. I’m not sure what form of motivation is more powerful; I think they both work. Most of the things I’m happy with myself about came because of my dad, not in spite of my dad. As a father, I’d like to believe Jack/Thomas would say the same so far in their young lives.
I went the fraternity route at the University of Arizona (aka, Harvard of the west). There was a piece that we all needed to memorize to become a member, it was called “The True Gentleman”. I still have it memorized word for word. I still say it out loud a few times a year, but I play it in my head much more. In my own life, I do better with reminders & check points to question my alignment with words vs. actions. The words of the True Gentleman, for me, is the ultimate guide for what I want to be said about me when I’m gone and how I want to live my life. My point here, on Father’s Day, is the reason I love my own dad so much is because of how close his own actions throughout his own life, are in alignment with the words of The True Gentleman.
The True Gentleman is the man whose conduct proceeds from good will and an acute sense of propriety, and whose self-control is equal to all emergencies; who does not make the poor man conscious of his poverty, the obscure man of his obscurity, or any man of his inferiority or deformity; who is himself humbled if necessity compels him to humble another; who does not flatter wealth, cringe before power, or boast of his own possessions or achievements; who speaks with frankness but always with sincerity and sympathy; whose deed follows his word; who thinks of the rights and feelings of others, rather than his own; and who appears well in any company, a man with whom honor is sacred and virtue safe.
-John Walter Waylan
My Dad (really my parents) has a fantasy land relationship with my boys, to the extent Jack and his girlfriend bypassed Kim and I and are vacationing with my parents tomorrow (separate rooms of course). Their relationship is just one example of living out a life of the True Gentleman and what comes from it when you do.
Happy Father’s Day!!